This picture was taken 8 days before Micah was born. When I was almost 39 weeks pregnant.
2020 – I think I knew almost as soon as Micah was growing inside, but in mid-March I began to seriously suspect that we were expecting our 6th child, it was right around the time Covid blew up in the States and Cambodia closed down churches and schools. I was hoping to avoid telling Josh until his birthday, but he asked before.
We had no idea back then how Covid would effect our birthing plans, but as things started to progress, I began to suspect that traveling to Thailand would not be an option this time. This led to a lot of research on birthing options in Cambodian. Our first two children were born by c-section. Even though I’d had three following births vaginally, many doctors would still require a c-section to avoid risk of uterine rupture. My desire was to avoid a c-section and find a doctor who wouldn’t require regular appointment (we live over 9 hours from Phnom Penh).
I finally chose a Khmer doctor in Phnom Penh who had a great reputation for working with foreigners and for promoting nature childbirth. We traveled in July to have an appointment with her to ask if she would be willing to allow me to have a VBAC. Thankfully, Dr. Li (pronounced Lee), was very agreeable to my having a natural childbirth, since I’d had three VBACS before. She seemed to have the attitude that this was my 6th child and I was an expert.
Dr. Li wanted me to come back in two months for a follow-up ultrasound. Not wanting to drag my family down to PP, I asked if we could skip the ultrasound and just show up at the beginning of November. The doctor explained she wanted to recheck a measurement in the brain. At the moment the area was measuring in the normal range (7mm with a normal range of 5-10mm). But she was concerned that in a few months it would be out of the normal range. After asking many questions to find out what would be done if the measurement exceeded the normal range, Dr Li finally told me that some people would not want a baby who had learning difficulties and possible seizures. Once I told her we would keep our baby no matter what, she said we could wait until November to come back.
We announced our 6th child once we had all our birthing plans in place. I told my mom on my 38th birthday. Interestingly enough – my mom gave birth to her 6th child on her 38th birthday.
Fast forward to September 1st – Josh and I were going away for the night while some friends watched our kids. We decided to get an ultrasound on the way ($5!). While there the doctor misunderstood us when we told him we didn’t want to know the gender and went on and on about how we were having a boy! Then he asked if the doctor in PP had told us about the problem in the brain. He said there was an enlarged area but that it looked like a slight problem – he called it hydrocephalus and proceeded to show us pictures and act out seizures. Very unsettling. Not the way we wanted to spent our getaway. The doctor said the problem might go away. So we just put that information aside and enjoyed our time together. Trying not to stress about it.
Once we returned home, I did lots of research and contacted a friend who is a pediatrician. She told us not to worry too much. What we needed was the exact measurement to know if there truly was a concern and how great the concern was (would there just be learning disabilities or would our child need brain surgery and a shunt for life). Five days later we returned to the doctor and asked for the measurement. The area measured around a 9mm. Very thankful. And I decided I was done with having ultrasounds up where we live by doctors who have had very little training. It’s very stressful to receive concerning information without all the data. They do their best up here with the training they have.
I had a pretty normal pregnancy – with afternoon and evening sickness that lasted all three trimesters. I started feeling Micah move around 12 weeks. Braxton Hicks started around 20 weeks. Due to my age the medical world classified me as a geriatric pregnancy, which I found really funny. Yes, I was tired and achey, more so than my earlier pregnancies, but I’m not sure what made the bigger difference – being older or having five other children to care for. The world does not stop for pregnant women. But it did! Church was cancelled. Bible Club was cancelled. Visits to Ban Lung were cancelled. Teaching the ladies Bible leaders was cancelled. Basically – everything was cancelled due to Covid for most of my pregnancy. All those cancellations were a relief to my tried pregnant body. I don’t know how I would have been able to keep up with our normal schedule.
We got to PP on Friday evening, November 6th. Our plans was to arrive the weekend before, but we found out the doctor was not available until the next week. Two nights later I had a lot of back contractions and we ended up going to the doctor Sunday morning for an early appointment, instead of Monday. Which ended up working out better, since the doctor wasn’t going to be in on Monday and we hadn’t been told yet. Had a great ultrasound with all measurements looking normal. I was dilated 2cm and the doctor had me do 30 minutes of contraction monitoring. She talked about admitting me, but I told her I didn’t think the baby would be coming in the next few days and I was sure I had time to go home (indeed I did, since he didn’t come for another week). I loved her response, “A mother usually knows her body best, but as a doctor I have to just check.” So after I did the monitoring – they let me go home. I only had one good contraction during that time and the worse part was having to be on my back!
And so the PP waiting began. Unfortunately, during that time. Cambodia had its first community Covid transmission in Phnom Penh, so we didn’t venture out a lot on outings. But we had a great time fellowshipping with others at the CMA guesthouse. Next week I hope to write about Micah’s birth.